Nasty pirate, Johnny Depp, has mocked his fans, the world famous 'Depp Heads', at a bar in the South of France according to reports circulating on the Cote d'Azur.
Depp, who had been drinking with his good friend Orlando Bloom at the Cristal bar located in Cap d'Antibes became agitated after Bloom praised his fans "You know they are a good bunch" said Bloom "I am proud to have a fan club - those kids appreciate my work and idolise me, they don't bother me in public. I love them."
Depp reacted furiously to Bloom's statement of affection towards the 'Bloomers', his army of fans. "My fans? Fuck 'em," sneered Depp staring angrily into his empty glass. "They have no sense of humour the rancid twats," he said in a faux English accent. "Those Depp Heads can't see what they are doing. They are reflecting on me. I'm a funny guy right? Talented actor right? Why are my fans so asinine? (look it up Depp Heads)."
Depp was of course referring to a spoof article written about him that has had an amazing 225 ratings. All 1's. "The story wasn't bad, probably a 2.5 maybe a 2" said Depp "but oh no, those leaches, those so called 'fans' give it a 1 - so now what? More stories about me being a 'wanker' no doubt."
Dead right Mr Depp.
*The Spoof!*
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